MAN: Are you Bill?
BILL: Yes.
MAN: I am here to take you to the bike tour.
BILL: (looking around) Okay.
MAN: Have you ever ridden on a scooter before?
BILL: No.
(The man laughs, which sounds like this, “Bwahahaahaaa!” - as if there are more ‘a’s the longer the laugh goes on.)
MAN: Bwahahaahaaa! (motioning to his back) Come. Sit. We will go.
BILL: (climbing on the scooter) Sure.
MAN: Do you want a helmet?
BILL: Yup.
(The man, who himself is not wearing a helmet, reaches under his legs and hands something to Bill.)
BILL: This is a bicycle helmet.
(The man starts up the scooter and begins backing it up as Bill puts on his bicycle helmet while trying not to drop the grocery bag.)
MAN: You are a big guy!
BILL: Thanks, man. Wait, have you ever had someone this big back here ride with you?
MAN: My wife is as big as you.
BILL: Oh.
(By now, the scooter is turned around and the man begins coasting down the hill.)
MAN: (calling behind him) Actually, she’s not THAT big.
BILL: Oh.
MAN: Bwahahaahaaa!
MAN: (shouting over the bike and traffic) How’re you doing, Bill?!
BILL: (shouting) Fine. Wait, you can’t fit-
MAN: So how long are you in Bali?!
BILL: -there. Jesus. Uh, ’til Saturday! Hey, there’s a wet spot up-
MAN: What is your job?!
BILL: -on the left. Okay, that’s kind of a steep hill, dude. What?!
MAN: What is your job?!
BILL: Well, I quit my job!
MAN: You quit your job!?! Bwahahaahaaa! Why?!
BILL: Watch the road, man!
MAN: Okay, Bill. We are here. (pause)
BILL: Thanks for the ride.
MAN: You need to have less worries, man!
BILL: What? Oh, I’m fine. That was all right.
MAN: You can let go of my shoulder now, Bill.
BILL: (lets go of shoulder) Yup.